Life!

So again I am posting mid week because I have had an exceptionally difficult couple days. Yesterday morning as my husband and I were out the door to go to work we heard Jack start screaming. He had a slip in the kitchen, and fell on his leg. At first we didn't think it was too bad, but then the knee started swelling. So we made the decision to take him to the e.r. I was unable to find someone that early to come in and work for me so I dropped him and daddy off and had to leave my son. It was heartbreaking. I wanted to be there for him and couldn't. Finally someone was able to come in at around 9 so I was able to go to the e.r.  By that time he'd already had x rays, seen that he had broken his femur (thigh) bone, and taken him by ambulance to the children's hospital. I was mad and upset that I missed all of this. And while I was busy cooking breakfast for residents at work, it took all my power to not start munching. But I made it through work without eating a bunch of junk. Then I finally got to the hospital. My poor son was all drugged up and he hadn't been casted yet. So we waited for that to happen and finally we were moved into a private room to settle in for the night. After seeing his cast, Brian and I have had to have some discussion about what is going to happen with our trip to Rhode island in about three weeks. So this is causing even more stress. And on top of that, I'm going to have to tell my boss that I'll no longer be working for the company. This incident combined with others lately have led me to this decision, and having Jack more or less immobile, and having to lift, roll, etc. to change him and what not, It's going to be hard for my mother to do alone with an infant. So all of this has lead to a very stressful couple days. All day yesterday, I wanted to eat. I wanted to munch off Jack's dinner, I wanted to order me a burger and fries, I wanted to get a coffee from statbucks. I wanted to put crap in my body that, at the moment would make me feel a little bit better, but in the long run make me feel worse. But I didn't, and I still haven't. I still want to, but I keep reminding myself that I have to be strong on this, for my children, so they can have a healthy mom. I keep reminding myself that I want to be the best and sexiest wife my husband could ask for. I keep reminding myself that (as Jenn says) this to shall pass. I am amazed that in my weakest moments, I can still be strong and still make the right health choices for me. It is hard today, it was harder yesterday, but I know that soon it won't be so hard. And that soon, I will be that healthy, energetic, happy woman my family deserves!